Last year we had an unwanted guest here at the Dyer homestead. He’s a woodchuck. I just know it’s a male since he’s very obnoxious and has balls, not literally (although he may) and he’s annoying. Must be a male. We affectionately call him “Chuck”, not “Woody”, since that would make me chuckle a bit much to warrant unwanted questions from an almost 5 year old and I don’t want to go there.
Well, Chuck returned this year since he had so much fun here last year. And he’s more annoying than ever. Our house does not have a basement, just a crawl space underneath. It’s Chuck’s “home”, I guess you could say the least. He gets underneath there at the most annoying times of the night and starts gnawing and scratching. It’s enough to wake me out of a deep slumber. Hell, it’s enough for Patsy to move to the other side of the room. And he likes it best under our bedroom. He has gone so far as to dig by the front of the house, kind of like his “formal” entrance to the Woodchuck Hacienda. I’ve drawn the line with Chuck and he’s overstayed his welcome here.
I emailed Matt today from work. He was at home, no kids, working on some stuff for work on the computer. The email went kind of like this:
Subject: Chuck
“Can you please work on him not being there when I get home?”
I didn’t want to say “shoot” or “kill” in it because if the FBI or BCI got hold of that email, it could lead to thinking really bad things, if you know what I mean. Unfortunatley, the opportunity to remove Chuck did not present itself today while I was at work. Chuck was here when I got home. But, opportunities do arise at strange times. I start blogging and the opportunity presents itself beautifully. I think Patsy and I will sleep very good tonight……
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